Valentine's Day: Loathe it or Love it

Editor’s note: Maxine "One Bad Max" Davidson is a supervisor at a call center in Jacksonville, Florida. She enjoys restaurant surfing, writing and traveling in her spare time. She is single, happy and believes that by going "cold turkey" in the dating world for one year will lead her to her soul mate. She has asked to guest write for the Black Urban Times when she is not stalking seeking her mate for life. LOL


By OneBadMax
Guest Writer

It's Valentine's Day again. A day to express love to our significant others. For some, it's a day of loathing. For others, it's a day to reflect and refuse to sulk.

Perhaps you're fresh out of a relationship. Maybe you're in between relationships (or marriages or divorces). On the other hand, maybe, you intentionally go out of your way on Valentine's Day to be anything but loving just because you can.

Different strokes for different folks.

****Valentine's Day Myths Revealed ****

I decided two years ago (after my last boyfriend -- that jerk) to not stress myself out on Valentines Day.

I swore I wouldn't get involved with the nearest (available or not) warm bodied male a week before Valentines Day just so I could say, "I have a Valentine's Day date." Or "Look, I got flowers and candy too!"

I'm 37-years-old, never had any children, never married (but I did come close once) and always seemed to be "between lovers" around Valentines Day. Was it some sort of sign of things to come (relationship wise)? Maybe karma? Whatever it was, I decided to lie down and take it. No fuss, no muss.

Two years later, Valentines Day 2013 and I'm as happy as a lark. While my fellow sisters ranted about losing weight, worrying over what their lovers would or would not do today; spent gobs of money on their hair and nails; waxed and shaved everything but their heads, I just watched in silence.

Some poor souls were even dreading how they would get through dinner with the new dud they settled for just so they wouldn’t be alone on Valentines Day. Others were actually sailing through the day high on love.

Again, I just sat in my cubicle smiling... at the flowers I sent myself while I fantasized about the warm bath and that great book I would read on my new nook when I got home. I figured I'd reheat the leftover three-cheese pizza I got from Bistro Aix last night, sip my cold water and call it a night...a great night.

No anxiety and no sadness. Just me and my pizza, and my book on a nook in my PJs, at home all alone, and happy.

To those that had a great Valentines Day: I wish you love, happiness, great sex and many more to come. To those, like me, who either chose to go it alone or were forced by circumstance, I say, “Konsa se pou li.” That's Haitian Creole for "So be it." It could have been worse.

I'm no hater. I just decided to toss the annual worry-fest for some much-needed worry-free time. Who knows, maybe the love Gods have it in for me to meet my 2014 Valentines Date this weekend. I'll see how the rest of the year goes, but I’m sure as Hell not going to worry myself to death over it.

C'est la vie, my friends.

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